I'm very much at a loss with my husband right now. I don't know what to do. I have the same typical story that every Marine has. Yes, I am a female Marine and I'm married to a civilian. Doesn't happen very often. Anyways. Everything was perfect....( until......Collapse )
In every way it was perfect. First off you should know both him and I are only 20 years old. I'm very mature for my age and I thought he was as well, but obviously not. We started dating as juniors in high school. We were best friends and then realized we liked each other. We clicked right away and dated for about 2 1/2 years. Then one day I came home (we were living together) and I said I need to be a Marine. He actually said he had been thinking about joining for a while and we were going to join together. Our jobs would have worked out perfectly together. Anyways this is December of 2008 when we both joined. We knew we were going to get split up if we didn't get married. We were already talking about it, so we figured alright. Let's do this. June 2009 we get married. I was scheduled to leave for boot camp in Sept. and him in Nov. July 2009, he tells me he doesn't want to leave anymore. Leaving me like wtf?? Let's not forget he was working at Wendys at the time, and still is!!
So I figure oh well. I cant make him want to join, I'm not going to make the kid miserable. So i leave for boot camp in Sept like I was supposed to. I thought about nothing but him. When I couldn't push any harder, I thought of him. He was my motivation for getting through that hell hole. Everything I did in boot camp, I did for him and for us. The hardest part of boot camp, was missing him. I wrote him damn near every day. Each chance I got on my one hour a night if i wasn't squaring away my shit or practicing drill I was writing him. I lived for mail call hoping there would be a letter from him. First month I was gone, there was a letter at least 2x a week. Then one day I get a letter saying that he moved in with like 3 of his friends. A party house. And then I don't hear from him again. At all.
I fly home. He picks me up from the airport. Now, he didn't have a car so I let him drive my Honda while I was gone. Guess what. He got a DUI and totaled my Honda in the process. After he had promised me he would never drink and drive, because I was worried about that. I think god damn. Oh well. I can forgive him, I've been gone too long to let this ruin us. Plus, I had full coverage insurance so I was good to go. I call the insurance, he didn't pay a single insurance bill while i was gone. Luckily I had tons of money in the bank to take care of it. Thank God. So I get the money from the insurance and I got a newer and better car. :] Worked out right?
So...a month of me being home and then I had to go to Marine Combat Training (MCT). He wasn't allowed to drive my car because hey, he got a DUI in the last one and totaled it and not to mention they suspended his license. The new car I got is a BMW 328i. Definitely don't want that wrecked, it's my baby. He was supposed to take the car to my mom's after he dropped me off at the airport. I also left him my debit card from my civilian bank account so he could buy a car cover for my car since it was supposed to be just sitting out. I finally get out of MCT and I get a call from my mom saying "Matt never brought the car to me..." I call him, and he says he'll take care of it. I'm now at my MOS school. Him and I are on complete opposite sides of the country. I get a call from my recruiter saying "Listen...it's none of my business but Marines take care of Marines. Good to go? Your husband is driving your car, and I'm hearing other things as well."
Matt denies everything. I call his best friend and his best friend says they aren't even friends anymore because Matt has completely changed. He drove my BMW multiple times, and not only that but he drove it home drunk a couple times. And then the heart wrenching news....the whole time I was at boot camp (3 months) and then again when i was at MCT (1 month) and still to this day....he's been cheating on me. Know something else? I get a letter from my bank, that debit card I let him use...It had $700 in it when i left. Guess how much it had when i checked it? -235. I didnt spend any of it...it was all him. I confronted him and he tried telling me that he only used it for gas so it couldn't have been. I was staring right at my statement, I could see everywhere he made a transaction. Asshole. Bull shit. ( until......Collapse )
Anyways...I'm really contemplating divorce. I can't do this. I deserve better and I can get so much better. Only thing is everytime I go to pick up the phone to call him. I chicken out. I love the man. But he's not good for me. I dont know what to do. How do I tell him I want a divorce? How do I get the courage?